Don't get motorboated by a stripper and then makeout her

Because your friend told you to and some man in a fancy suit tells you he will pay you twenty dollars if you do. Then after you do the deed, the man never gives you the twenty dollars, yet you tell your friend that you gave said dollars to the stripper because you believed that she needed it more than you do, when in fact, you never actually got the twenty dollars in the first place.

And as a double "don't", Don't ever drink Four Lokos, again.